Mami Rhedeg

  Today marks what, for most of us, counts as the end of summer... The August bank holiday. Except this year, it feels like a bit of a swizz. We're 2/3 of the way through 2020, and for most if us, it's a year we'd rather not repeat. Autumn officially starts (this year) on 22nd September. But with the imminent return to school over the next couple of weeks, it feels like summer is already over.  This summer has been a bit of a let down, if I'm entirely honest. We nanaged to move house. But no one has seen it. Not really. All the excitement of finally moving to the house that works for us, gone. Because the COVID rules mean we can't have our friends and family around. My lg has shown noone (except for Gu) her new bedroom. And she really wants to.  There was no Christening. My lg has yet to see the inside of her Church. Yet to meet the Vicar. There was no holiday. We booked just after Christmas, and then cancelled it. Because we booked a holiday designed to make a 7yo ...

I’ve spent the past months compiling the thoughts I've had as a Mam to a new baby.  It's a tongue and cheek summary of  If breastfeeding, you will plan outfits based on how quickly you can whack a boob out. Even when you know you're sat at home all day on the sofa. You will regret some outfit choices which aren't as practical as they first appear.  You will literally get your boobs out anywhere if you think it will stop the baby crying. And wonder why they won't stop if it doesn't work. At some point, you remember to check their butt as well, and that usually solves the problem.  Sleep deprivation is a thing. There is a reason it's used as a torture technique.  You will get itchy as soon as you start to feed. You will not be able to scratch that itch for the duration of the feed, and it will be the longest feed your baby has taken for a while. They know. And they will grin at you whilst they feed.  You will grossly underestimate how many muslin squares you ...

Except, at the moment, they can't.  I had PND and PNA after my first child. It took me a while to admit it, but my GP, my employers and the support services were amazing and I got back on my feet, with the coping strategies I needed fairly quickly. I count myself lucky that I work for an organisation that is willing to help and has, over the past few years, gone above and beyond to support me and others at work. Now though, a combination of limited available formal support, and the restrictions on extended family life as part of the COVID-19 regulations has made it harder to use the coping strategies that have been part of my daily life for the past 7.5 years. Depression and anxiety don't just go away. You learn to live with them, and not let them control you. But that relies on you being able to implement your own personal coping strategies. For me, most of those coping strategies have been ripped away. The occasional coffees have disappeared completely, as we all struggle to ...

  Friendship. One of the most difficult routes we navigate as we go through life. Over the years I've had times with loads of friends and others, like now, where I only have a few. Of those few, the majority have been there, by my side, for years. Maybe not always geographically close, and for some of them there have periods where we've not stayed in touch as often as we probably should have.  The friendships I have now are less superficial. People who I can be myself with, without having to sugar coat my thoughts and feelings.  I'm often geographically alone though, and sometimes, that's tough. Because I can't just go for a quick coffee or a walk and chat with them. The lifesaver over the past few months has been the myriad world of online communication. I've learnt to use Zoom, Facebook Rooms, and made a huge use of what's app. My 7yo knows how to use Zoom, and is an expert at using her class Teams notice board.  But, just sometimes, you actually need to s...